Most parents assume their teen hates math because it’s “too hard.”
But after years of teaching thousands of teens and talking with even more parents, I’ve found something different.
They don’t hate math.
They hate not knowing why they’re doing it.
And honestly? They aren’t wrong.
We wouldn’t tolerate this in our own work.
If your boss handed you a spreadsheet and said, “Fill this out. Don’t ask why,” you’d think they were out of their mind.
But this is exactly what we do to our kids.
The Real Issue: No One Explains the Why
I recently talked with a dad who was frustrated because his daughter “just shuts down” during math lessons.
He had tried new curriculums.
He tried tutoring.
He tried sitting beside her.
None of it worked.
So I asked him one question:
“What part of math does she think is pointless?”
He paused.
Then he said, “She can do the math. She just doesn’t think any of it matters.”
There it is.
Most teens don’t struggle with equations—
they struggle with purpose.
Today’s teens are wired differently.
They’re curious.
They ask questions.
They want meaning.
When math feels like a random list of steps, they disengage.
But when they see the reason behind those steps, everything changes.
Why Students Need Context
Think of the first time you learned to factor a trinomial.
No one explained what it was for.
You were just told:
“Do it. Memorize it. You’ll need it someday.”
But imagine you were told:
“This is how engineers reduce complexity. It’s how we break big problems into smaller ones. It’s how we analyze patterns.”
Totally different experience.
Purpose creates motivation.
The Missing Piece in Most Math Curriculums
Most curriculums do a great job teaching how to solve a problem.
Very few explain why the problem matters.
That’s why so many kids think math is just:
- steps
- formulas
- worksheets
- chapters
- tests
But math is not a list of steps.
Math is the language we use to understand patterns, build technology, design systems, and solve real problems.
When teens discover this, their entire attitude shifts.
What You Can Try Today
Here are three simple ways to reconnect your teen to the “why”:
1. Ask them what feels pointless.
This alone opens them up.
You’ll hear exactly where their frustration sits.
2. Give one real-world example.
Not a long lecture—just a quick connection.
- “We use linear equations to compare prices.”
- “Geometry helps us understand shapes and construction.”
- “Factoring helps us simplify complicated systems.”
Teens don’t need a full lesson—they just need a hook.
3. Stop focusing on perfect steps. Focus on understanding.
A teen who knows why will push through the hard parts.
A teen who doesn’t will fight you every time.
A Better Approach to Teaching Math
In this week’s video, I break down the real issue behind “I hate math” and show you how to flip the script so your teen learns with interest instead of resentment.
👉 Watch the video: Your Teen Doesn’t Hate Math — They Hate This
If you want to get your teen unstuck, start with the “why.”
Everything else becomes easier.
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